Daddy's Little Girl (A Homespun Romance) Read online

  She blinked, thinking of the journal hidden in her suitcase. No one except Claire knew about the essays and poetry she liked to write.

  "I like reading, and I did a few courses in journalism once." Tense, she waited for Jason Graham's reaction. Uncle Samuel had always said she was as dull as ditchwater without talent for anything except cleaning and cooking.

  "You'll enjoy visiting the library in the British Museum then. The London Library in St. James Square is very good too, and then there are all the bookstores in Charing Cross Road. Some of them invite authors and poets to read their work there. You might enjoy something like that."

  It was so exactly what she'd like, Sara held her breath for a second. She didn't know if it was Jason's hand on her shoulder, or his words that had confusion spilling into her system.

  "Maybe," she said cautiously, "but it's going to take a while for Kelsey to get used to someone new. I'm not going to leave her with a couple of strangers right away."

  Jason's hand tightened on her shoulder. It had never bothered Diana to leave Kelsey with anyone. Why should Sara feel so responsible for her?

  Unless it was all an act, like the role she'd assumed when Dee Dee had come over. His eyes narrowed. Women were good at playing a part. Diana had been so different before they'd married. It had taken exactly two weeks after they were married for Jason to realize that Diana saw him as her ticket up in the world. He was to be groomed for a role she had in mind, so she could rub shoulders with the uppermost crust of society. The realities of becoming a mother had been something she'd never been able to handle.

  You tricked me into becoming pregnant, and now you're forcing me to play mother, as you conceive the role should be done. I won't do it, Jason, do you hear?

  As he recalled Diana's favorite line, Jason's hand fell to his side. He wasn't going to be taken in again.

  "Kelsey will be fine with whomever we hire," he said abruptly. "Just make sure you find something to keep yourself occupied. I don't have the time or inclination to entertain you."

  He strode from the room, unaware that Sara was staring open-mouthed after him.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Twenty four hours later, Sara was positive she should not have agreed to interview the applicants. She'd spent fifteen minutes talking to each woman, and they all seemed to have perfect qualifications. After they'd gone, she pored over the notes she'd made as she'd talked to them, wondering why her uneasiness had increased with each meeting.

  The responsibility of making the best choice for Kelsey rested heavily on her shoulders. The little girl was too solemn for her age. Her insecurity was apparent in the way she clung to Jason. Whoever took care of her had to build up Kelsey's confidence, be a stable factor in the little girl's constantly changing world.

  Would Jason be annoyed that she had decided none of the women she'd seen today were suitable? Ten days with Kelsey hardly gave her the right to make arbitrary decisions. It was just that something had seemed to be missing. Sara hoped she would be able to identify the `something' by the time Jason came home, so she could give him a concrete reason for her decision. Biting her lip, Sara went over her notes.

  The key turning in the lock a little while later, startled her. A glance at her wristwatch showed it was only four fifteen. Kelsey was still asleep, and she hadn't started dinner.

  "Hi!" Jason put his briefcase down, and placed a large box on the kitchen table.

  "I'm afraid I wasn't paying attention to the time." She was beginning to sound like a recording. "I'll get Kelsey up, and start dinner right away. It won't be long. Why don't you sit down and relax?"

  As Jason loosened his tie and undid the top button of the blue shirt he wore, Sara stared at his big hands with the lean, strong fingers. He caught her gaze and asked, "Do I have an invisible sign around my neck that says, `Vicious when hungry', or something like that?"

  Sara stared at the quirk of his mouth. He was laughing at her? Strange, she hadn't paid any attention to that beautiful, mobile mouth before. A sudden, dizzying warmth flooded her as she continued to look at it.

  "Sit down and tell me about your day." Jason filled the electric kettle with water and plugged it in.

  "I...I'll get Kelsey up." She had to get away, to let the funny feeling in the pit of her stomach settle.

  He looked at his watch. "Another half hour's sleep won't hurt Kelsey. She can stay up with me tonight. I've brought some work home. How did those interviews go?"

  "I didn't like any of them."

  The defiant way she said the words caught Jason's attention. Setting two mugs on the counter, he turned and looked at her. "Oh?"

  "I don't know much about these things, but none of those women felt right for Kelsey."

  Her color was high. The way she clenched the pen in her hand made her knuckles show up white. Something had ruffled the little owl's feathers.

  "What type do you think will be the right one for her?" Pouring hot water into the mugs, he added tea bags.

  "She needs someone who will cuddle her and play with her. Someone who won't mind getting down on the rug and playing with her every now and them."

  "And these women don't do those things?"

  He watched Sara lift a notepad from the table and flick through the pages. "The first women talked of discipline, the second said she didn't like anyone interfering in her routine, the third said she'd worked for an Earl and knew how important manners were, the fourth and fifth looked as if their clothes had been starched with them inside."

  Jason fought the urge to laugh. Sara's serious expression told him now wasn't a good time.

  "That will never do," he said, in a voice that sounded choked.

  Sara nodded. "Kelsey doesn't have to be the perfect child, only a happy one. She doesn't need someone to fill her life with rules and manners and discipline. Those things are important, but what Kelsey needs now, is love. None of these women looked capable of loving her."

  Taken aback, Jason stared at Sara as she flipped the pages of the pad. She'd made notes on each woman?

  "Most important of all, she needs someone who can tell her stories. Not one of the applicants mentioned reading to their charges, or telling them stories."

  The indignant note in her voice made the corner of Jason's mouth lift.

  "And stories are important?" he asked, as he brought the mugs to the kitchen table.

  "Of course," Sara said quickly. "Very important. They stretch the mind, help the imagination to grow."

  Jason stared at Sara, caught up in the sheer poetry of her words. "I heard the story you told Kelsey last night."

  "You did?" She wondered if the intercom system had been left on in Kelsey's bedroom.

  "I was on the balcony after the rain stopped, and her bedroom window was open, so I sat down and listened. You're a wonderful storyteller, Sara."

  She felt herself blush. All four bedrooms opened onto a balcony that stretched the length of the flat. She hadn't thought Jason would have been out there. Her story had been a simple made-up tale about a goose that had decided to go to London on business, and taken his little gosling along with him. "Sometimes kids understand a situation better when they hear or read about it in the form of a story."

  Sara sipped her tea cautiously. Had Jason been upset by the fact that in her story, the gosling hadn't started talking? The story had ended with the gosling opening its bill, and yelling, `Daddy!' much to everyone's delight.

  Jason stood up, and Sara got to her feet as well. "Dinner....," she began, when he interrupted. "Don't move from there. I'm going to get Kelsey up, and the three of us are going out for fish and chips. There's a place just around the corner that makes the best fish 'n chips you've ever tasted."

  "We don't have to go out today," Sara protested. "You cooked yesterday. I'll fix a meal in no time. You must be tired after the long hours you've worked."

  Jason didn't know who'd made the rules Sara lived by, but it was time she learned some new ones. The finger he placed on her lips, was
the best way he could think of to stop her protests.

  "A walk helps me relax after a day at work," he told her. "No more arguing. Open the box while I get Kelsey up."

  When he'd disappeared in the direction of Kelsey's bedroom, Sara touched her lips. The spot where Jason's finger had rested, burned. Strange as it sounded, she hadn't wanted him to remove his hand. A part of her still ached in protest that the contact had been nothing more than cursory.

  Sara blinked. What on earth was wrong with her? Had being cooped up in the flat, made her lose her perspective of the situation? Jason Graham was her employer, and he'd warned her in no uncertain terms that he wouldn't tolerate any familiarity.

  Sara stared at the shiny grey and silver striped box. Reaching out, she slipped off the bow and lifted the lid. Her heart jumped when she moved the pink tissue aside. The incredibly delicate silk and lace undies were in her size. There were six matching sets in jewel colors. Next she pulled out two teddies that made her blush. It seemed as if they'd reveal more than they would cover. Under everything were two nightgowns with matching robes. Ribbon, soft lace, and delicate embroidery combined to make the garments incredibly beautiful.

  The brown paper bag in the corner of the box looked like a lunch bag. Sara opened it and her face flamed as she took out a set of her own underwear. It didn't take a genius to guess how Jason Graham had guessed her size.

  Sara dropped everything back into the box and replaced the lid as if the box contained a venomous snake. Her cheeks burned with embarrassment. Why had he done this?

  "Do you like them?" He came in, a sleepy Kelsey still resting her head on his shoulder.

  "Why did you get them?"

  His eyes narrowed at her tone. "Why not? I though you needed a few new things and I just happened to pass a shop at lunchtime."

  It came to her in a flash. He'd seen her things the day he'd folded the laundry and he felt sorry for her. Sara thought she'd dissolve into a big puddle of embarrassment.

  "I don't need them," she said stiffly.

  The anger in her voice reminded him of the day he'd given her the ring. Didn't the woman like anything? He looked at her face and got his answer. Sara was embarrassed by what he'd gotten her.

  "If it makes you feel better, I didn't pick the things out myself. I gave one of the salesclerks your things and told her to put in whatever you might need, and I picked up the box after lunch."

  That did make her feel slightly better. "If you'll tell me where you got them from, I'll return the things for you."

  "It's only something small, Sara. I want you to keep them."

  "I never accept charity, Mr. Graham."

  What made her think he was offering any? He thought of his surmise that Sara Adams might be badly off. He'd been like that when he'd first started his company, too poor to afford things, too proud to let anyone guess.

  Putting Kelsey in her chair, Jason handed her the covered plastic cup he'd filled with juice, and took the chair next to Sara. "Look, its no big deal, okay? I just happened to notice you needed a few new things and I got them for you." She didn't look at him, and exasperation made him say, "I don't want whoever we hire to wonder why my fiancé is wearing darned clothes."

  Sara's face burned. She hadn't thought of it from that angle. Pushing her chair back she stood, forcing herself to look at Jason. If it was part of her job, she'd accept the gift. "I'm sorry I didn't think about that myself."

  The feeling he'd done something wrong, that to Sara all this was a big deal, bothered Jason. She'd left the room as if wearing the new things was a chore she couldn't avoid.

  He looked at Kelsey who was watching him over the rim of her cup. "Women!" he said with a shrug. "Who can understand them?"

  Kelsey put her empty cup on the table, shrugged her shoulders exactly as her father had, and smiled.

  Jason picked her up. "Come here punkin'," he said. "We have to think up a few games between us. Think you'll like to play horsie?"

  Peter Wilton, a man he'd done his masters with in northern California, had told him today that his son loved being carried around on his Dad's shoulders. Jason was going to try it with Kelsey.

  In her room, Sara put the box on her bed and stared at it. Jason didn't seem to be the least bit embarrassed about buying her lingerie, but she was.

  Jason Graham had won this round. Something about him warned Sara, he would win every round he wanted to. Sara wished she had enough money to offer to pay for the things, but she didn't. The box alone looked as if it might cost two weeks salary. Her heart sank as some of the implications of being Jason's temporary fiancé dawned on her. It wasn't only everything she was, it was also everything she had, that would have to reflect her new station in life.

  She took the lid off the box again and lifted the things out. To do her job well, she'd have to act as if it were no big deal to her as well. She'd have to bury her qualms and learn to fit into Jason's world, so she wouldn't let him down.

  All of a sudden Sara felt scared...as if she were being carried out of her depth by strong, dangerous currents to an area where the things expected of her, would be those she couldn't give.

  Laughter greeted Jason as he unlocked the front door the next day. Sara and Kelsey sat on the carpet, surrounded by dolls and tiny garments. The flames of the gas fire picked up gold highlights in Sara's hair.

  She looked up and smiled at him. It was the first smile that held no trace of shyness and Jason was surprised by the tug of response inside him.

  "I found the perfect pair," she said, as Kelsey ran to him and wrapped her arms around his legs.

  "You did?" His expression didn't give away the fact the agency had already told him what had happened. Lifting Kelsey, he put her up on his shoulders.

  "It's a couple really, Marge and Ed Binty. They've seen twenty years of domestic service, is how they put it. Between them they'd cook, clean, and care for Kelsey. They have passports and a work permit. They've travelled all over the world with an English couple and their two children who are teenagers now. The Bintys say they love visiting new places and it doesn't matter to them where they live."

  She had drawn her knees up to her chest, and was staring into the gas fire.

  "But do they tell stories?" Jason teased.

  Sara nodded seriously. "She and her husband both do. They have six grandchildren. I know Kelsey won't lack for hugs and kisses and kindness with them. If it's all right with you, they can start Monday."

  "That's fine." It was strange how he trusted Sara's choice, especially when he'd been afraid to leave Kelsey in the same room with her own mother, when Diana had been drinking.

  "There's something you should know about them." Sara bit her lip, let it go.

  "What's that, Sara?"

  "They're not like the other women the agency sent out. Those women were more...more professional looking and spoke the Queen's English. The Bintys are ordinary, like me. They're from Yorkshire and their accents are a bit different."

  Jason's jaw clenched. "I have no problem with ordinary people, Sara. Tell them they can start right away."

  "Don't you want to meet them, decide for yourself?"

  "No Sara. I trust your judgment."

  "Why?" Her gaze searched his face for an answer.

  "Because in the last two years, I've never thought of Kelsey needing love and stories. I've just hired someone who would take care of her. You've shown me what's really important."

  Sara blushed, then looked as if she was going to cry. With a muttered `Excuse me', she dashed from the room. Jason wondered what he'd said to upset her now. Kelsey patted his head and he said, "Hold on now. Daddy's ready to go."

  His version of a gallop through the dining area and kitchen had Kelsey in splits of laughter that warmed him all the way through.

  "I had something in my eye," Sara said, when he came back to the living room.

  Sure, and he was the next heir to the throne. Jason decided to let it pass for the time being. He had something else on hi
s mind right now. Sitting down, he let Kelsey tumble off his shoulders onto the couch. "One of my business colleagues and his wife have invited us out for dinner any day you feel like it."

  "I can't leave Kelsey."

  She didn't want to go to any parties with him. She was too afraid of letting him down. The way he'd acted about her underthings told Sara her black skirt and pink blouse wouldn't do for these occasions.

  "Kelsey won't be alone. The Bintys will be here. You can even put her to bed before we leave."

  Sara bit her lip and stared into the fire. Nervousness mingled with the fear that circled her heart. She couldn't do it.

  "What's the matter, Sara? Do you need a new dress for the occasion or something?" Diana had always made a fuss about not having a thing to wear.

  "Of course not," Sara said quickly. Did he think she was hinting he buy her more clothes? "I'm just not sure I'll fit in with your friends. I don't want to embarrass you. Why don't you go by yourself?"

  Jason shook his head. "I hired you as my fiancé. Now the only way to give the situation credibility is for you to act like one. You did great with Dee Dee, so I don't see what the problem is here. Just think of it as another acting lesson, or whatever."

  Her face flamed at the memory of the kiss they'd exchanged. Were there going to have to act the part of a couple madly in love in front of his friends?

  Jason didn't want her to think he was deliberately embarrassing her by referring to the day Dee Dee had visited Kelsey. "This is important Sara. If necessary, the Wiltons will testify on our behalf that we are engaged, but I don't want my friends to have to lie for me."

  "But all this is a lie."

  "Only if you want to quit," Jason said. "My offer of marriage is still open."

  Sara turned her face to the fire. She had no intention of accepting Jason's offer. Marriage was a bond between two people who loved each other.

  "I'll come to the Wiltons with you a week after the Bintys have been here," she said quietly. "That should give Kelsey time to adjust."

  "Fair enough."